the truth will set you free

The Truth Will Set Me Free!

*LIAR, LIAR, PANTS ON FIRE*

It’s time to announce the lie that would burst my pants into flames!

As a  reminder, here were your choices:

1. I once won $1,000 with a scratch off lottery ticket
2. I’ve been sky diving
3. I was expelled from high school my senior year
4. I graduated college cum laude
5. I smoked my first cigarette at the age of eight
6. I once had my tongue pierced

A Summary Of Your Guesses

Only one person thought the lie was that I graduated college with honors. The most guesses goes to the lie being me expelled from high school. Thanks for the votes of confidence! The second highest number of guesses went to the lie being me sky diving. Do I look chicken to you people? The remaining three were literally tied with four guesses each for the lie being me winning the money, smoking a cig at eight, or my tongue being pierced.

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AND NOW FOR THE TRUTH

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DRUMROLL PLEASE

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For those of you who thought me winning the money was a lie…. WRONG. I did actually win a $1000 on a measly little scratch off! For as long as I can remember, my dad has put lottery tickets in our birthday and Christmas cards. One Christmas I scratched mine off and YOWZA! Talk about surprised! We had to drive to some office and get the money because it was too much for the little mart where he’d bought them to pay out. After taxes I still got around $900. I gave my brother $100 cuz I’m kick-ass. I tried to give my dad some but he wouldn’t take it, although he let me buy him dinner with some coaxing. But my brother took the cash. He’s no dummy.

For those of you who thought me having my tongue pierced was the lie…NOPE. When I was about 24 years old I went (during the day, sober) and got my tongue pierced. At that time (this was…ahem…quite some time ago) this was not as prevalent a piercing for women as it was for men, and certainly not with anyone I knew so I shocked some people for sure. I waitressed at the time so it was a conversation starter to say the least! I wore it for several years. In fact, I had it when I met Jim! I honestly can’t remember what made me finally take it out. I guess I got tired of it.

For the one person (elleroy!) who hoped the lie was that I graduated cum laude (her logic being the truth was I actually graduated magna cum laude…sneaky!), this one was actually TRUE. It didn’t come easy, and I believe it was the result of my major being something I truly loved, but I actually did manage honors in Environmental Science. Proof that no matter how effed-up someone is when they’re a kid…there’s always hope. Woop!

Alyson…I’m sorry in advance…but the one about me smoking a cigarette at eight years old? Totally FACTUAL. I know. Awful. Both my parents smoked. My brother and I were left alone a lot. These were the latch-key days. We were little hoodlums. What will the mice do when the cat’s away? Smoke their parents’ cigarettes, that’s what. And this was when my parents were still together. After the divorce, we were really alone a lot. That’s when the trouble doubled….

Which brings me to the one about being expelled my senior year of high school. YEP. Totally true. I was expelled because I never came back after my out-of-school suspension, which I received for never completing several back-to-back in-school suspensions, which I received for skipping class. Incidentally, Jim and I went to the same HS and I remember him from suspension our junior year! (I was a frequent flyer) We were soul-troublemaker-mates! ANYway, I obviously was going through some tough times at home and otherwise. What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger, right?

*sidenote: That summer I got a job, borrowed a little money from my grandma and got some sweet wheels (Sweet is relative. It was a used VW Rabbit), enrolled in an alternative school, and worked my ass off to graduate only three months after my friends. LIKE A BOSS.

So that leaves only one thing! The BIG FAT HAIRY LIE! I have never, ever been sky diving! This was second highest in guesses so kudos to you all! I have no desire to sky dive; however, I would choose it over bungee jumping every single time. WILL NOT bungee. No way. Could vomit just thinking about it. I can actually see the appeal in sky diving. I don’t think I’ll ever do it, but I’d also never say never. Except about bungee jumping. Never.

Thanks for playing along everyone! I hope that was as much fun for you as it was for me! #ThatsWhatSheSaidLastNight #Sorry #HadTo

Are any of these your truths? Do you have things in your life that are stranger than fiction? Have you ever had to tell a white lie that snowballed into a big one? I heart your comments BIG!